Khoma - a final storm (2010)

if this is the final storm hopefully it hits sweden really fucking hard. i hope some band members read this review, or as i like to call it a re-BOO!!!!!

following isis into the idea of "lets sing like pussies over uninspired stupid music" khoma from sweden of all places released what could be the biggest lol pile of 2010, half way through the first song i wanted to google "is the guy from khoma going to be ok?"

answering the question of what would happen if some lazy band decided to sound like opeth all the while refusing to acknowledge what wusses they're being vocally.

well the answer is the same weird drum beat intro-ing about 2/3rds of the songs on a cd full of really bad ideas. from there a lot of really really silly lyrics, the worst song easily being "the inquisition" which i can only assume is about the lead singers uncles all drinking beer at a family gathering wondering why little lord fauntelroy is wearing black lipstick and refusing to come out of his room.

all in all this band needs a couple trips to the beach and a fucking frisbee and maybe they could get a good album together, but if you're in the mood for a lazier version of anathema katatonia and opeth then by all means dive head first into this pile of fucking wah. you guys are from fucking sweden cheer up college is free over there there is no pollution every swedish girl i've met has had big fuckable tits, and you've got the sedin brothers.

ok one more song before i perma-delete this. "by the gallows" which is fucking hilarious at this point, you're not a folk metal band when was the last time anyone saw "Gallows". ok well like i've said a hundred times now, lazy katatonia sound with out the production quality, i would not be shocked if this guy also sang for minus story.(too inside?) holy shit the chorus is here a second time already, is it possible for an album that went nowhere to seem rushed? the singing on this album is fucking unforgivable, how did i even recognize this bands name?

well i needed to kill time before the realworld challenge fresh meat 2 came on, and this album 100% fucking failed at it. they have a song called "mist" which i assume is a gigantic rock opera about what a stupid game myst was, i understand it was a puzzle game but fucking give me a hint about what the puzzle is about, i played the game for 14 minutes once and the whole time i was literally begging for a hint as to what to do, just pressing squares in some panel and waiting for the observation telescope to move or something, IM NOT FUCKING KOREAN YOU PIECE OF SHIT GIVE ME AN OBJECTIVE!

dl.